


Forgiving Daniel Fitzgerald Reagan

by Thepresidentofrussia23



Category: Blue Bloods (TV), FOX NFL Sunday RPF, Law & Order: Criminal Intent, Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Danny Reagan is bi, Dreams and Nightmares, Everyone Is Gay, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mike Dodds Lives, Mike Dodds is bisexual, Mpreg, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Aftermath, Rape/Non-con Elements, William lewis is Danny's rapist, danny reagan crying, danny reagan needs help, danny reagan whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-04-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:34:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 17
Words: 11,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23164075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thepresidentofrussia23/pseuds/Thepresidentofrussia23
Summary: All it took was six hours and fifty two minutes...six hours of disappearance before anybody found him beaten and raped to an inch of his life. Danny is shaken and unable to identify his attacker. Baez now needs to work with the Staten Island detectives to find his rapists and put them all behind bars. If Danny doesn't lose his sanity by then...that is."I tried and tried, to bury and hide and after a while, I was able to pretend it never happened at all, too bad it all comes rushing back...when Barba will interrogate and fry me on the stand."
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr.
Comments: 63
Kudos: 14





	1. The aftermath is horror

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Qui3tlyR3ading](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Qui3tlyR3ading/gifts).



Danny could hear people shouting around him, to stay awake and alive, to hang on..  
"Danny! You're gonna be fine."  
"Danny, just hang on, the ambulance is on its way!"  
a familiar voice yelled into the raido as he instinctively flinched out of the way, he could hear a woman reassuring him  
"You're safe, it's okay, its over now"  
He opened his eyes again and could see a brunette woman looking at him with empathy and pain and a bit of understanding as she helped the medics over and the medics professionally rolled him onto the backboard and they strapped him down and took him into the ambulance to take him to Bellevue. He could hear Baez giving her statement, her voice growing fainter as he saw a blonde man sit next to him, with stark blue eyes, gazing upon him with concern as he looked around in terror, the white, bright lights flooding his pupils and he winced against it and he let unconciousness claim him once again as the sirens of the ambulance faded out into distant noise. He wished Linda could come and hold him, to give him love, but Linda was dead, his wife Linda had died in a helicopter crash triggered by a bomb by the cartel who retaliated against him for intercepting their cash shipment that night when he had made several arrests against them as well.   
His eyes darted around in terror until they focused onto the young blonde detective named Carisi and moaned   
"I...I don't...I don't know what's going on here, why are there so many detectives around me? Am I under arrest?"  
Carisi calmly replied   
"You aren't under arrest, however, you...you unfourtanetly were found raped outside a bar and we need your consent so that the SANE nurses can do a rape kit on you."  
"I...I was raped?"  
"Yes you were, I'm very sorry to tell you this."  
he bawled even harder as he nodded   
"Yes, do the kit."  
He could remember them taking pictures of his injuries and then they scraped the insides of his nails and made him wash out any semen that could be in his mouth as evidence, and then they started the anal and vaginal examination which was the most invasive procedure and then they then took his statement and he was handed hospital issue scrubs so he was finally released after taking care of his injuries and making sure they were properly bandaged and wrapped up as he saw his father Frank and his entire family outside waiting to support him, he felt his dam that he had bulit up, while giving the statement to Carisi, break down and shatter into a million, billion pieces as he bawled endlessly. He could feel his soul die a little more as they gazed with him with pity and pity was something he was never going to get used to at all ever in his lifetime, hell, he was taught in the Marine Corps that pity was for the weak. And he hated himself for being so horrendously weak.


	2. Reflections of terror

Danny opened his eyes to the sound of the air whirring through an air vent as he looked up at the white tiled ceiling and he could see that the wind was fluttering the privacy curtain a little bit, he was hoping that he wouldn't be able to remember what had happened that night before he went back inside his hospital room, tired out and drained to hell as they let him go after a lengthy hug that made him suddenly uncomfortable and claustrophobic, he wanted to not be touched at this painful time and he didn't want to remember why.   
Danny lay down in bed as they jabbed in needle after needle after needle and gave him the morning after pill as well as the PEP pill to prevent HIV, he winced with each needle jab into his arm as they concluded the rape kit and had sent the swabs and the DNA samples to be stored for testing and he let the tears fall as the nurse soon left the room after asking if he wanted to be alone. Danny felt humiliated and emasculated when they did the rape kit and he wished he could be anywhere else but here, he wished for Linda's comforting presence but he knew he would never see her again, he would never hear from her again because she was dead and buried and that broke his heart into a million pieces because he loved her so dearly and there was no woman in his opinion that could capture his heart the way she did.  
He sighed bitterly as Mike Dodds came with follow up questions of his own and Danny was unable to remember anything before, or what led up to the rape and it was so horrendously frustrating, he was pulling at his hair in frustration and sobbing in humiliation and trying to hide his face in his hands. Frank came in and sighed  
"Son, I need you to tell me what happened, the full truth."  
"The honest truth is...I have absolutely no idea whatever the hell happened to me last night, I swear by god, I swear I'm not lying at all to you...I simply cannot remember at all what the hell happened since I left my house to dump the trash in the trash can, all of it is an absolute blank. My brain just can't access that memory at all, I...I'm so so sorry dad, I feel so awful!"  
Danny sighed and grabbed his things and soon left the hospital the next day after sleeping in the hospital and he went home, staring at the mirror, feeling damaged and ashamed from the nightmares of going to the trash can and sudden pain and blackness emerging from his neck, he couldn't remember why this was happening, who caused it or how this was caused at all and it terrified him beyond all words of comprehension. He ran to the toilet and threw up the acidic contents of his stomch and kept throwing up, he was a fucking Captain for god's sake, he shouldn't have to be here throwing up like a hormonal teenager, he sobbed in shame for being raped, for allowing himself for being so vulnerable and he had been raped because he was unaware of what had happened.


	3. Forbidden Truths

Danny silently unlocked his door and saw that everything was turned over, neon yellow crime scene tape lay limp on the ground as it fluttered by the strong gust of wind that the open door let in, he looked around and found dust on everything, as if CSI had turned his house upside down searching for DNA evidence, his locks had been changed and his house felt like it too, had been raped...just like him...how strange to see how the tables have turned so quickly and now he was drowning in the pain of his own sorrow that he couldn't often alleviate from the victims of crimes. He felt as though this was a final violation, but he was wrong, because he would have to testify against his rapist, even though he didn't even know who the rapist was or even how did it even occur in the first place, he knew DNA was the only piece of evidence that prosecution had at this point and this was a desperate moonshot to gain a conviction against practically nobody at this point. They had nothing to work on, not even eye witness testimony.   
Danny felt discouraged and drained, and most of all, dehumanized and burnt out by the American justice system which seemed to grind to a halt for him and him only. He decided to make himself a cup of coffee and drink some while staring outside the window and let his tears fall again, he was crumbling and he couldn't admit to himself this out of fear and shame and he hated this so much. He pulled out a bottle of the strongest whiskey that he had saved for the worst days of his life and he drank his face off, he drank and drank, not giving a fuck that he had work tomorrow or the fact that he was a goddamn Captain and that an entire precinct depended on his leadership and he felt so drained to hell, he didn't even want to move a single muscle in his entire life anymore, he was that horrendously exhausted of life.  
Danny went to work heavily hungover and sporting a migraine for starters when Captain Benson and ADA Peter Stone knocked on his door and he looked up and he gulped, knowing that they were here for a specific reason, not just here to drop and chat and trade office gossip despite his desires for it being so. She sighed and said   
"Captain Reagan, the DNA results from the rape kit have come in...your rapist...and my rapist...are the same, his name is William Lewis."   
And Danny's world crashed into a million pieces at those words as he tried to understand the weight beneath them as he listened to her very carefully, in horror, that is.


	4. Broken hearts bleed red

Danny stared blankly at the mess of shredded items and fingerprint dust lying on walls, floors, furniture, the place was still a mess and the mess weighed heavily on him, just as much as the assault did and he wished he couldn't feel this way, he tried his hardest to stay strong as he examined the damage and noticed Joe's picture was missing so he contacted his mom who ordered there be police protection for Joe and he tried to clean up the mess as much as he could as tears swam in his vision and he could feel his chest heave up and down as he sobbed loudly, his walls of strength that he had tried to build up in front of everyone, including Captain Benson shatter into a million pieces. He fell to his knees bawling, he felt so overwhelmed by the physical, mental and emotional destruction that surrounded him right now, he felt all alone and he felt like he was crumbling at times because he was so busy pushing people away due to his strong feeling of shame and embarrassment from what had happened...after all...every male rape victim has been told at one point or another:  
"Men don't get raped."  
He pulled out a bottle of soda, chugging it all up and burping loudly while eating nachos and watching TV and letting the tears fall, not responding to any phone calls or anybody knocking on his door, he was too emotionally drained to even greet visitors, much less see anybody or deal with their messy emotions because he was so exhausted from learning that William Lewis had raped him and what was even worse was that he couldn't even remember where was he raped or how, no matter how much he tried to think. He went to work and sighed bitterly, he was touched by the efforts of Staten Island despite them hitting walls from Lewis's attorneys in resisting his arrest warrant, he could see that Detectives Vendaya Cruz and Jamie Luis were working round the clock with ADAs Adam Northholt and Eli Manning, Manning was more specialized in sexual assault cases since his own sexual assault in college decades ago that changed his career trajectory from Football to Criminal Law and now he had a personal mission against this rapist, he was determined to take down William Lewis when many other ADAs including Barba had failed and now he was ready to stake his career on the line to take down this bastard, however he knew he needed the help of ADA Rafael Barba, a man of experience and sass and the perfect amount of attitude to help break down any objections that the defense may have. Danny was praying that the trial would never come in his entire lifetime, he prayed that the people would forget about his rape and that the trial would be forgotten and would never happen at all


	5. The Shadow of the Candle

Danny sobbed some more as he woke up the next morning and he dialed his brother Jamie's number, Jamie was too busy having sex with Vinny Cruz and Eddie Janko to even bother answer the phone and when he picked up he grumbled   
"Hello? Who's this?"  
"Its Danny you moron!"  
"Um! I'm...I'm busy at the moment!"  
"Jamie! Please I need you to...agh! CMOOON!"  
He found himself angrily yelling at the dial tone and cursing his head off as he called Joe who said   
"I have like no room here, I have a baby that's literally gonna pop out any minute and the other room has been converted to the baby room. Sorry Danny."  
He knew Erin was going to reject him anyways because according to her, he was  
"Pushing the limit on the amount of favors he could expend from her and she was quite fed up of being used as the warrant printing machine and she had better things to do"  
Danny sighed and clicked the button to lock his phone as he tossed it aside and sobbed in humiliation, not even his own siblings were willing to help him during this time and his trial date was rapidly drawing closer and closer with each breath he took and he could feel the terror in his arteries poison him slowly throughout his body and he was helpless to stop this fear. He sighed and unlocked his phone, hating to impose himself on his mom, he felt so embarrassed to be so needy and dependent during this time, he felt so broken and shattered inside, as if nothing anybody said could ever put him back together as he packed his things and called his mom to say that he was going to be staying over at the Bay Ridge house and he grabbed his things and locked his house when he stood near the curb, waiting for the public bus to come when he had a flashback to when he had been knocked out with a iron and he had been dragged inside, he could remember the excruciating amount of pain, and the feeling of someone's hands around his ankles as he was dragged inside his own house again, the flashback faded quickly as he shook his head and sighed as he saw the bus pulling over to pick him and several other passengers waiting, up as well. He went on the bus as he scrolled through his phone and read some news articles while waiting for the bus to go to the transit station and then he boarded another bus to the house in Queens.  
He sighed as he hauled his bag with him and went to the house and knocked on the door, he felt tears running down his face in shame for reaching out for help, but he knew he needed this, he needed comfort so much right now, he needed all of their strength as he was still awaiting STD results and the anxiety was drowning him it its darkness and he hated it so much as Henry opened the door and he simply hugged his grandfather wordlessly in tears, mentally exhausted and drained out of his mind. He knew the rapist was out there, and he wanted to die from that fact so much, he was so demoralized and drained beyond belief.


	6. Hope dies with harsh realities

Danny unpacked his things in his old room as he stared at the innocent young and childish memories of a lifetime bygone before his eyes. He sobbed as he sat on the couch and drank another bottle of sprite and started eating nachos while letting tears fall onto his food, he had been waking up with fragmented nightmares and he would wake up screaming loudly to the point that even Henry would wake from his deep sleep and run over to comfort his traumatized son. Danny could remember someone dragging him inside and then up the stairs to his own bedroom as someone's voice taunted him   
"You're so weak you couldn't even stay awake when I pistol whipped you, you can't even stay awake for that! You should be punished for this!"  
Meanwhile Eli Manning had little to no evidence other than the DNA evidence from the rape kit and the testimony of several officers, but he knew he needed the testimony of Danny Reagan and that man was not even able to remember his rape much less even ready to be trial prepped for the harsh and often, mentally excruciating cross examination, he knew this trial would take years upon years to even begin jury selection so he wasn't worried about that, he was however worried about Danny's track record as a cop being brought up in court, he knew as a Criminal Prosecutor for the District Attorney's office, he knew that sometimes horrible secrets would often be brought up to light in such a way that even victims were humiliated and shamed and their case would be lost forever. Eli was doing heaps upon heaps of paperwork especially with rape on the rise and he had many different cases to do and not to mention the fact that he had chronic insomnia that often weakened him and made him susceptible to migraines that often crippled his ability to think. He sighed and massaged his head as he felt another migrane come on as he typed up another report when he picked up a Skype call from his older brother down in Denver, he missed his brother Peyton so much, he hadn't spoken to Peyton since two weeks ago and his schedule was overwhelming him so much so he answered  
"Yes Peyton? How are you?"  
Peyton smiled   
"I see that you're busy again with another case?"  
"Oh yea it's a very upsetting case, I really didn't expect to ever get this kind of case in my life to be honest, it's frankly very...triggering."  
"You mean..."  
"I'm starting to get nightmares of the guy, Peyton, he's a complete monster, he...he's the Devil incarnate. I swear to god."  
"Eli? Who IS he? Can you at least tell me that?"  
"It's...It's my rapist...William Lewis."  
A loud gasp was heard on the other end of the phone and the phone was dropped. And Eli just let out a loud sob as he broke down with tears and he felt his soul shatter a million times over again.


	7. Never feel what I saw

Danny at this point was becoming depressed and lonely, his heart was beating, but every breath felt like it took effort, funny how something that only never required even a mere thought, could suddenly require such effort in such a short amount of time, he could feel the broken fragments of his soul press into his vulnerable flesh, he could feel it bleed inwards slowly, the blood was poisoned with his sadness and the empty feeling he had become all too accustomed to. He was going downhill and he was ashamed to admit it, the pain, the blackness that was inside of him, the man who had ripped this hole inside of Danny, there was no way anyone could ever fix him, there was no way anybody could ever save him from himself. The nightmares often left him drowning in cold sweat and he would wake up screaming to the point even Henry slept through his screams and he was helpless to the inner demons, in which he was in a losing war against, he had no armor, no weapons and no backup, he felt as though he was on his own and he knew he was on his own because the weight that was crushing his soul, his chest and his shoulders, nobody could ever save him from that weight except himself, even his therapist told him that.  
Danny was desperately trying everything, from books, to radio programs, to hypnosis to try and cope with the trauma, he felt as though he had been discarded at work and at home, nobody wanted to hear of his problems or his pain, no one seemed to even care anymore. So he withdrew slowly and quietly, he went home after three weeks, tired and drained. He felt as if there was a pulsating pain in him, beating and growing like a tumor and spreading inside of him, sucking away the life from him and leaving him all shriveled and brittle, like an outer shell ready to crack into a million pieces. He knew he was crumbling, his breakdowns in the bathroom, his increasing cravings and his nausea that constantly came to the surface, he felt a monster named Depression eating him alive and he was struggling to stay alive and he felt completely helpless to his circumstances around him.   
He was terrified of what would happen if he dared to try and to surrender all hope to the depression, but how can one win a war against one's inner demons without weapons. He hated himself and he hated his life. He could only sob loudly as Barba, Manning and Stone struggled to build a case for him


	8. I don't know, so don't ask me why

Danny bitterly looked out the window, tears swimming in his eyes as he watched the rain drip onto the window, he had been banged in sick for two weeks against his will and he hated the thought of being trapped inside of his own house, with so many horrendous memories and reminders of his assault. Danny had a glazed over look in his eyes, shining with unshed tears that refused to fall because he refused to let them to fall, he refused to show his emotions and yet they were on his sleeve and like someone said   
"A good cop is always a bad liar."  
Danny could feel the grief of something rip through his heart, was it the sense of his purity? His peace of mind? The fact that he had been emasculated and humiliated and that he couldn't even remember any of it? All it took was six hours...six hours and fifty six minutes of rape, torture, humiliation and physical assault as well as hostage negotiations that resulted in him being dumped near a bar and abandoned to die, he still had aches and pains that echoed through his body if he sneezed, hiccupped, or whenever he took deep breaths, and he hated that sort of pain and yet, it was a reminder that he had survived the assault and that he was alive and for that, he loved that pain, he loved feeling that sort of pain over and over. Danny went into the shower for the hundredth time in a row, trying to scrub off the filthiness that he could imagine was growing on his skin, no matter how many times he tried to shower, he still felt contaminated, filthy, used like a condom...like a whore and tossed aside like a street walker after being used for one's sexual pleasure. He wished that what he had went through could be filed away in a case file, folded up and tossed aside in the filing cabinet, forgotten for at least a few years or even months, to pretend it had never happened to him, to try and disassociate himself from the anguish involved in the case, but no...this was his pain and he was in it, it had happened to him. He was going to have to live with this rape for the rest of his days and my god, he didn't even want to even begin thinking of the long road ahead as he tried to avoid the 'Incident' as he was now miserably trying to file it away as. It was a flimsy and pathetic attempt at trying to forget the pain and the sorrow associated with this memory, but one can only admire his courageous attempt to forget this horror.   
Danny sighed and whined to his higher up Police Chief William Dodds   
"If you are going to forcibly quarantine me as if I have a contagious STD, it would be nice to be given some cold cases to keep my mind busy at the very least."  
William sighed  
"You need a break Danny, I was told about what you went through and under orders, I'm giving you two weeks off Danny."  
Danny groaned   
"And lemme guess, those two weeks under order are coming from my mom, is that correct?"  
"I can neither confirm nor deny those allegations Danny."  
Danny grumbled   
"Just get Lieutenant Baez to send me over the cases please. And did everyone suddenly just get access to the report?"  
"We are trying to trace down the leak."  
"Doubtful that you will...ugh, this was going to happen sooner or later anyways." Danny snarked  
"Just give it until this Thursday and people will forget."  
"Lets hope I'm one of those people."  
Danny slammed the phone on the cradle and muffled his curses as he spat them out angrily and sighed and ran his fingers through his greying and whitening hair. Danny bitterly sighed at his vision, knowing he wasn't getting enough sleep most days, his average at best was around two hours tops and he often struggled with the nightmares of seeing William Lewis's face, he could remember a faded deep scar on the right side of his face. Danny could see on his own face, his skin was paler and his eyes were sunken deep and his body was much thinner. He wanted it all to end, he wanted the pain to stop. But he knew the trial rested on his shoulders.


	9. Is there anything that can seem real?

Danny finally, slowly and torturously survived the two weeks on his own, when he showed up to Sunday dinner, Henry noticed how pale and sunken Danny looked, his eyes had purple dark shadows under them and how his clothes hung loosely on him, Danny looked drained and lifeless, he looked like a shadow of himself, no longer the man that could fight crime with so much energy. His eyes were glazed over with the lack of focus and his skin almost looked transparent, as if he was beginning to fall ill. Danny went back to work, dressing sharply in his dress blues, his dress shirt was stark white and freshly pressed to perfection, not a wrinkle in sight. his collar had the two brass bars on each side to denote his rank as Captain, and he buttoned up his jacket which had nice shiny golden buttons he had worked hard to keep shiny and clean as per uniform regulations and he then put on his pants and his shoes that he had worked to keep polished and then his badge and the stack of ribbon bars as well as his peaked cap. He bitterly sighed and realized, this was as normal as he could get, it was funny how a uniform could cover up how much damage inside of him that William Lewis had caused to his mind, and yet there was so much he couldn't cover up regardless.   
He stood at the Six-Six precinct and sighed inwardly as he cursed himself   
"Get a fucking move on Reagan, the whole goddamn precinct needs you, they have been working with Captain Murphy for the past two weeks you pathetic pussy!"  
He started moving out of the car as he inwardly encouraged himself   
"That's it, you're doing it, good job, just open two doors, ignore the stares and yell at the detectives to get back to work if necessary and then go to your nice cushy office. Just a few more st-"  
When he opened the door, everyone was staring at him as if Sonny Burnett had just strode in their precinct instead of the precinct in Miami and had surrendered himself here, minus the guns being pointed at Danny's head. Well fucking shit, and what was worse was that his throat at that moment decided to freeze up and his voice box refused to obey him at that moment. He was completely stunned at all the eyeballs staring at him and it fucking unnerved him at that moment as he tried a sassy   
"Morning Ladies and gents. Happy Monday? What? All the criminals were suddenly just caught just like that?"  
They all had the sense to look contrite and they went back to doing their work as Danny went to his office, gasping for air for what seemed like an eternity, his juice ad suddenly run out and he was so raring to clock out ASAP. He was grateful for the fact that he had the sense to shut the door behind him as he sighed and went into the routine of doing paperwork and burying himself in more work and supervisory duties since he was more of a supervisor than a detective nowadays and that meant he needed to go to therapy and it was safe to say that he didn't welcome that idea at all, as if spilling his guts to a random stranger was his idea of fucking healing, yeah fucking no. He sighed and grumbled some more when Police Chief Dodds slammed down a piece of paper containing the date, time and the location as well as the directions to the office. He silently hoped to all the gods that somehow, the lady who ran the counseling service would forget, but no, somehow on his cellphone, two weeks later, a reminder to show up to the appointment popped up on his phone and he cursed. He was doing a godawful lot of cursing and he couldn't have cared less about the cursing, he had read somewhere that people who curse more are more honest than those who don't. Danny thought he had hit rock bottom in terms of shitty weeks and shitty days, he was dead wrong because soon Manning called him and said   
"Hope you're ready to testify Danny, we've started jury selection a hell of a lot sooner than we anticipated. Sounds like having friends in high places helps I guess."  
Danny couldn't help but note a trace of envy in Manning's voice. He couldn't stop himself from shooting back  
"Oh and having a dad who is a legendary quarterback isn't 'having friends in high places' My mom has no influence over the criminal justice system, you get that straight through your mind, you hear?"   
He angrily hung up afterwards cursing in Hebrew.


	10. Meaningless Chaos

Danny could remember bits and pieces of his rape and how William Lewis tied him up and taunted him, insulted him and raped him, he could remember how William Lewis laughed at his desperation to flee and he mocked him saying  
"Even Olivia took it far better than a pussy man like you. You are a pussy who can't take it and yet you cannot say no, you beg for it like the whore you are and yet you scream and scream for me to stop, you are weak and you are pathetic. You can't fight me. You call yourself a man and this is how much you are able to fight back? You are a complete embarrassment! I will teach you a lesson you will never, ever forget in your entire life."  
Danny could feel a digit penetrate him as he howled at the intrusion, he felt horrified and ashamed, as if someone was stripping something away from him that mattered most to him, he screamed in terror of death and he screamed as he was gagged up with a red bandana to silence him from screaming and William Lewis unscrewed a bottle and dumped the whole bottle of gasoline on Danny, he then pulled another bottle and dumped it all over his bed, and then he proceeded to rip down his own pants and underwear and then rape him, Danny let out a loud, painful, heartbreaking scream as he felt every inch of Lewis's penis penetrate him in such a ghastly way, he screamed and screamed and cried out for help, but his piece was in the safe, locked away and he couldn't reach his inner closet in time, even if he managed to break free of the headboard that he was tied to. Lewis meanwhile was thrusting in and out, in and out, jagged sharp thrusts over and over that tore little tears into Danny's soul with each penetration. His disgusting, chilling smile froze all the blood in Danny's veins as he groped and cupped Danny's ass and groin to stimulate him and Danny could only silently scream   
"No, don't betray me now, no, please, no please noooo!"  
He could feel his length harden with a sudden arousal that he didn't consent to, didn't want at all and yet, Lewis was jacking him off as if he was a gay lover of his and Danny was shaking his head and tears ran down his filthy, messy face as he wanted to cry aloud, his face was greasy and tired looking as he tried kicking his feet over and over, in a pitiful attempt to resist. Danny dared not to make contact with William Lewis, the monster that raped and murdered and destroyed lives, he couldn't bear to see what lifeless pits he would see in those black pupils, as if he was a hypnotic viper and Danny was the prey who would become the hapless prey, and then the Beast demanded  
"Look into my fucking eyes! I SAID LOOK! I WANNA SEE THOSE PRETTY GREEN EYES OF YOURS WHILE I'M FUCKING YOU. LOOK AT ME OR GET YOUR BRAINS BLOWN OUT LIKE PABLO PICASSO'S ART!"  
Every second, it felt like an eternity of lifetimes heaped upon each other, he wanted to fight this man off, but his legs felt so numb as Lewis had planted his legs on top of Danny's legs and he could feel his wrists chafing and aching, he could hear the wooden bed rocking up and down with each thrust, he hated this torture and he wanted out of it now, he wanted the misery to just simply end right now, he suddenly came in Danny, moaning   
"OH YESS! YESSS!"   
As the warm seed flooded Danny's womb, Danny himself felt vomit flood his mouth as he tried to swallow it down, he felt as though he was swallowing acid and bleach, a strong and insane mix as he tried to breathe, it felt as though he could feel his throat was burning and he wanted to gag and scream but it was the challenge of the century. He could hear Lewis cruelly chuckling   
"What's the matter Captain, this too much for you?"  
Danny could hear Lewis cocking his gun and firing at Danny and all Danny's last thoughts were  
"This is it."  
Danny gasped at the flashback, this one was more vivid and detailed than the others as William Lewis was on the run and now Goren and Eames had to find him before it was too late and they knew time was of the essence.


	11. Dust of the Saturn

Danny could so many things he had done wrong throughout his life, and it made him so miserable because he had so many chances to redeem himself and he didn't bring himself to even take the effort to improve himself and now he was being forced to bare out his broken, shattered soul to twelve strangers in hopes of them even listening to his story. Danny was in the middle of doing paperwork when his phone suddenly rang from Eli Manning and he picked up and the ADA seemed so frantic sounding when Danny said   
"Hello? Counselor?"  
"Captain Danny, there has been a problem, a massive, huge, logistical problem that's probably gonna piss you off, so please sit down so I can tell you."  
Danny was suddenly concered as he added   
"Wait, slow down right there, calm down Counselor, breathe, now, tell me what is it that has you in such a hurry right there?"  
"Lewis...Lewis fucking skipped on the cops that were supposed to keep an eye on him until the indictment hearing, he's on the loose and now FBI Special Field Agents Robert Goren and Alexandra Eames are on his tracks, we can promise you that he will not escape our grasp for long Captain, I can assure you of that."  
Danny wanted to yell and scream, but Eli soon continued  
"Captain, I also am notifying you due to a clause in New York law, I am recusing myself from this case. ADA Rafael Barba will take over for first chair, I am so, so sorry Captain, I didn't want to have to tell you this but this has happened and it is a serious technicality against me, it is in now way, your fault whatsoever. I just can't take on the case. I am so sorry."  
The other end soon clicked and Danny slammed his phone down on the cradle, he bitterly observed that he was doing that a lot now a days as well, he was angrier, more bitter and more harsh on his officers and was a suspension happy officer, he was more authoritative and ready to yell down any detective who dared challenge his position of power and he was throwing up as well, his nausea especially around coffee was not letting him go and he hated throwing up so much. He was moodier and eating strange foods such as nachos with ice cream dumped straight on top of the melted nacho cheese and he just crunched his way through it all, as he ate and ate, while waiting and seeing in anxiety, his heart beat in terror each time he left his house and each time he came back home, he was extra paranoid of his surroundings. He sighed as he gagged again and threw up in the sink as he sighed, he flopped on the couch as he watched the news programs and he sighed as the world passed him by and he felt as though he was a mere observer to a film like version of his own life.   
Barba called soon afterwards and he picked up and answered  
"Captain Reagan here."  
Barba icily responded   
"Well then, if it isn't the Captain Reagan who has made a splash in the news frequently for misconduct. At any rate, this is ADA Barba and I'll be taking over first chair and I will be questioning you on your story, I will need to meet up with you at One Hogan place, make yourself familiar with that address because I won't do it for you."  
"All right then."  
"Jury selection is almost complete, I just need to go over a few dozen more potential jurors and I think I have a couple that might be sympathetic to our side, so that might be some good news for you Captain Danny."  
Danny sighed "Okay and when is the date and time?"  
Barba gave him one and Danny bid his farewells and hung up, he sighed bitterly as he rubbed his hands over his face in severe distress and mental exhaustion.


	12. Power of the Nebula

Danny grabbed his things and poured himself a glass of water and drank it, he was going to take a pregnancy test at the insistence of a concerned Henry who had seen Danny lose his dinner just as soon as he ate it and had the strangest cravings that Danny didn't have since he had Sean and it was clear from the fact that Danny wasn't taking good care of his health, that he was very depressed and hurt and struggling to recover from what the rapist had done to him. Danny was slightly suicidal as well and often recklessly crossed the street before the crosswalk sign flashed "Walk" as if in hopes there would be a truck or a car only paying attention to the green light, only to run him over unintentionally. He wondered if it was possible for a catastrophic asteroid to strike and kill him. He certainly hoped that it would be possible at any moment now to end his pain. He sighed and decided to unbox the pregnancy test and pee on it, as he put the timer on and he was doing the rest of his paperwork and heard the timer buzz as he saw the pink plus sign in the window and he sobbed loudly. He snapped the pregnancy test in half and threw it in the rubbish bin and covered his face while tears streaked down his exhausted face. He was still recovering from the rape, and now, William Lewis left behind a baby for him to raise.   
Danny threw up in shock and horror all over again as he sobbed and screamed, melting down over the fact that he was having a baby, he didn't know what to do at this point and he was so going to have to put his career aside to raise this child that he didn't even want at all. He bitterly sighed and went to One Hogan place, carrying the paperwork he needed to complete for his job as a cop, he had so much to do nowadays, he didn't care to take care of himself, it was after all, the perfect excuse for self-neglect, to be so busy with his job and his duties as a Captain. Danny was then questioned by Barba about his police statement and he was being prepped for trial and his police statement was verified as true, accurate and complete and the only truth that was to be written and entered into court. He sighed as he was being asked over and over and over until he felt like melting down, Danny then added   
"I'm starting to remember bits and pieces of my rape, I remember his face...his eyes, the scar, everything about him, I can remember it all."  
Barba knew that meant that Danny needed to enter another updated version of his police statement so that they would be able to hand it over to the Defense so that they too could begin trial discovery as well and do their own preparations. Danny was then briefed on what the trial would consist of and at that moment, Barba's phone rang and it was from the FBI, they had him under arrest, but Eames was mortally wounded and would not make it through the night, making it a possible federal murder one case and that meant this would no longer be held in New York, this would be held in a Federal Court in Terra Haute where the killer of Don Kent and Maggie Kent also was imprisoned. Danny knew this case was definitely going to become high profile now, if it wasn't before. And he suddenly had flashbacks to the O.J Simpson trial back in the late 90's and he could remember how all of the cameras were on that man 24/7, and the Aaron Hernandez case in recent memory, still freshly scarring the reputation of the Patriots Organization as well as the fans who loved the Patriots and rooted for them as well.


	13. Self-forgiveness is impossible

Danny was solving a case of a double homicide and a suicide when he felt another wave of nausea hit him and he threw up all over his trash can as he moaned and whimpered, he sighed and mumbled   
"Better go see a doctor, maybe I can get a prescription for prenatal, while I am at it"  
He then went to the hospital and was able to meet up with his doctor, who then gave him prenatal to take everyday, once a day during breakfast. He bitterly sighed as he was given the letter of summons to the courthouse and he started doing his paperwork after his appointment and he was starting to feel as if the whole world was crushing him, and yet in a way, there was a strange sense of normalcy that his family tried to maintain around him, his grandfather Henry made it his personal mission to make phone calls to Danny during break and ask him how he was doing, of course this made Danny feel ever so cared about, he felt good inside because at least someone cared enough to check on him.   
The indictment hearing was the worst thing Danny had dealt with since the IAB, since Thomas Wilder and Mario Hunt as well as Sonny Malevsky, he sat on the leather bound chair with Rafael Barba in front of him. He knew these people would indict a ham sandwich and fry it to hell for good measure. Danny was still so traumatized from the rape that he was unable to bring forth the full details of the rape and how much destruction they wreaked upon his body and his mind as well as his soul. He was only able to speak of the rape in sanitized, censored terms, as if one could ever sanitize the destruction of a human being. Danny also noticed how Jamie seemed to have more time now a days to spend time with him after work to play the Xbox and some video games, he enjoyed the brotherly time and he didn't mind all the time he was spending with Jamie and Joe, but sometimes Danny felt as though they were being a bit overbearing in this case. He knew shit had hit the fan in terms of his personal life and he hated to admit that the extra family time and the added sense of normalcy was starting to help him in a way that he hated to acknowledge was starting to make him heal. However there was still much damage still left to be addressed, like the fact that he still wasn't able to sleep most nights and woke up screaming loudly at night seeing William Lewis and it was so unbearable, he often saw in his dreams, Lewis stalking into his room, tying him up and raping him, before drenching him in gasoline and striking the match and lighting it on fire, burning him alive and burning down the house as well, two birds in one stone. Even Barba warned him that the defense would consist of Rita Calhoun and John Buchanan, both of them were famous defense attorneys and Danny had almost no respect for them in any way whatsoever.   
That night Danny went to Peter Stone's house and laughed bitterly aloud  
"They fried my ass off like I was the one who was the rapist, they might as well try Rafael Barba next for murder one."   
Danny snorted aloud as Peter sighed  
"That's the criminal justice system for you, especially the defense attorneys, you can't let them get to you like that. Things will get tougher from here on out so keep yourself ready, okay, and another thing...Eames is dead. This will only get harder from here on out."  
Danny sighed as he looked down and wondered if the Beast had raped her too before shooting her dead, he could only wonder what terrible things had happened to her before she was brutally murdered in cold blood.


	14. Ignorance is eating me alive

Danny felt guilt over Alexandra Eames's death, apparently she and Goren had spotted him there at the gas station making a purchase of gas and some snacks, as if he was prepared to leave for a long road trip to never return, to hunt down more victims and to continue his rampage unabated. Eames had engaged first after calling for backup as Goren tried crossing into another aisle of the food mart section to try and flank Lewis from the back while Eames would distract him from the from the front. Goren could hear gun shots ring out as he ran through the aisle and he heard a woman's scream ring out, they sounded too much like Eames as he tried to make it into the aisle, he saw Lewis walking over, cradling her dying face and then grabbing the cashier, who screamed in terror, her shrill screams grabbing his attention as he demanded.  
"Let the woman go! NOW! You don't want things to turn ugly now, do you?"  
Lewis cruelly smiled and shot back   
"I already made things plenty ugly enough for your partner right there, didn't I? You could easily empty your clip in me right now, knowing that you could easily justify it as self-defense and people will look the other way. You would have a sympathetic jury that would easily find me guilty several times over, isn't that true? Isn't it not?"  
Goren smiled as he aimed at Lewis's knee and fired into it, shattering the kneecap and severing several ligaments as it caved under his weight, the woman ran over to Goren sobbing loudly and he held the whimpering woman, and reassured her softly  
"You're okay, you're safe right now, the man is going to jail for a very long time."  
He then cuffed William Lewis and handed him to Anthony Renzulli who read out the Miranda rights for him and then took him to the squad car, while Goren ran over as he held pressure on her wounds, she was alive but barely, she was gasping for air as her eyes remained firmly closed, there was so much blood all around her, it was frightening to see so much of it surround her in such a way, he wasn't prepared to see his partner hurt this badly he cared very deeply for her and his heart was beating with terror as he screamed   
"I NEED A BUS! AGENT DOWN!"  
He shook with barely repressed anger and fury as he wanted to punch that bastard over and over as the medics ran in and professionally rolled her onto the backboard and then lifted her onto the stretcher and then wheeled her away as he was told they would be going to St Victor's hospital and he grabbed his carkeys and drove as fast as he could with his sirens on, blaring loudly and the lights flashing, following the ambulance as the cars pulled over to give the ambulance room to zoom by, his heart beat like crazy from anxiety as he started stress eating, he soon arrived at the hospital with the ambulance and he quickly parked in the car garage as he ran into the hospital and went to the lobby area where he spoke to the nurse at the desk and she smiled   
"Hello there, how may I help you today?"  
"I need to see FBI Special Field Agent Alexandra Eames. I'm her partner Robert Goren."  
For good measure he showed his badge to her so that she would understand that this was urgent and he was a federal agent.  
She quickly typed through the computer as she found out   
"Alexandra is now in recovery, her injuries are that of two gunshot wounds to the upper left side of her chest, severe bleeding. She isn't looking good."  
Goren was guided to her recovery room where she lay sedated and there where bags of saline and machines beeped and hummed steadily and he was given a gown, gloves and a hair net to prevent his hair from shedding on her, he blinked out tears as he held her hand and prayed, he knew that the doctor would only let him in, there was a chance she wouldn't even make it through the night, her wounds were too grievous for the doctors to do any more extraordinary measures to save her. The whole room was covered in sheeting to protect her from germs and viruses. He watched as the beeping became rapid and the doctors ran in, trying to do CPR, but she had flatlined and the doctor called out  
"Time of death 10:22 PM."  
Goren broke down when he was notified, he noticed cops, agents and his own boss were there and he hadn't noticed at all as the man laid his hand on Goren's shoulder, he hadn't even begun to confess the depths of his love for her when she had died.


	15. Ungodly Revelations and festering wounds

Goren had hauled the perp, marching William Lewis through a gaggle of cameras, with reporters shoving their mics in front of the man who was indicted and soon to fry in front of Barba, Goren made sure he had the cuffs on nice and tight to the point that they were cutting through his wrists, the light bulbs in the cameras as well as the shutters clicked and the boom phones were held above the grief stricken agent as he hauled in his partners killer as he did the perp walk. Goren had made sure to read the indictment aloud as well saying  
"The grand jury of New York state hereby finds William Lewis guilty on one count of aggravated sexual assault, one count of assaulting an officer, and one count of rape in the first degree. Do you understand the charges upon which you have been indicted for?"  
William cleared his throat and replied   
"Yes."  
William was being taken into his holding cell as the media reached for the best angle to capture the whole circus spectacle that was unfolding in front of them, it rivaled that of the spectacle for the Menendez killings as well as the Gacy the Clown killings and the Co Ed killings by Ed Kemper. Danny could hear the shouting and the screaming echoing down to his office and he gulped as his heart lodged its way into his throat. Danny grumbled a few Russian curses under his breath as he came on out and suddenly, everyone froze and the cameras focused on him as they peppered questions at him such as  
"How do you feel about the arrest of your rapist Captain Danny?"  
"What are your thoughts on the arrest of William Lewis."  
"What is your reaction to the death of Special Field agent Alexandra Eames?"  
"What is the next step for William Lewis's trial?"  
Danny was frozen as he gulped as they shoved cameras in his face, fortunately at that moment Garrett barged in and yelled at the press to leave at that moment and that the Police Commissioner would be able to comment since Captains were not permitted to speak to the media. Captain Reagan was stone faced to the cameras, betraying nothing for the cameras, not even gazing towards his rapist as the man was being booked into custody, they were ushered outside as Danny went into his office and sobbed loudly in his father's arms, he felt like he had been humiliated and stripped naked and paraded in front of the public unprepared for this sort of press conference in his entire life, especially suddenly so impromptu. Danny was a person of action, not words and he hated cameras, he often froze up around them and he would forget his lines or give a snappy answer that was not often well received by the public. Danny was the type of person who preferred being behind the scenes sort of captain instead of the type of captain that was on camera all the time and smiling while giving sanitized answers for the people to dissect brutally in the court of public opinion.   
He sobbed loudly to his father   
"I tried and tried, to bury and hide and after a while, I was able to pretend it never happened at all, too bad it all comes rushing back...when Barba will interrogate and fry me on the stand."  
Garrett only could hold his step son, tp try and offer him strength and comfort during these trying times that had Danny left in pieces as he tried to remain as a picture of strength and tried to ward off the pitying looks as well as the false concern that many may have tried to cast to him, to try and establish a sort of connection.  
Danny quickly threw up in the closest trash can that he saw and he knew that was at least his breakfast and lunch gone as well, he retched as Garrett rubbed his back and took him home with the security detail and Garrett went to the local Wal Mart after dropping Danny off at his house and then buying soda, some anti nausea medication and some soups as well as crackers and he came home and went inside to see Danny sleeping on the couch and cuddling his blanket tightly and he sighed as he locked the door and then put the food away for later and he sighed, he was so worried for Danny during his mentally stressful time, the funeral for Eames was tomorrow and Danny was sure to take it really hard since he cared deeply for his brothers and sisters in blue.


	16. Winners and losers

Danny was sitting on the witness stand again, he was slouched over in his chair as Barba asked him  
"In full detail as much as you can remember, please tell the court what happened on June 20th 2019."  
Danny inwardly scolded himself  
"Open that fucking mouth of yours and speak you blockhead! C'mon! its not like you don't have fucking nightmares of the incident you complete moron, cat got your tongue?"  
Danny sighed and took a deep lungful of air in his lungs, as he felt the sweat soak his dress shirt and he opened his mouth and began  
"I left the house to throw some trash away, I had filled the garbage with some stuff I needed to throw out, when I opened the flap of the trash can and I felt a hard iron bar hit me, I instantly felt everything go dark and I could feel myself hit the ground, I was so tired, I opened the eyes as I saw William Lewis flip me over and cradle my face and drag me inside my own house by my own ankles, I remember my eyes opening and closing every few seconds as I was dragged into the main foyer and then up the stairs up to my bedroom, I lost consciousness as he dragged me onto my own bed, I couldn't even try to move, my body wouldn't move of its own accord. I woke up again and tried moving my wrists and ankles over and over. I couldn't move them at all, they were tied up to the bed frame and I was so damn helpless, as he taunted me, threatened me to not scream or...or he would make a Pablo Picasso artwork of my bedroom walls, he aimed his gun at me for good measure and then he undressed me, and he..."  
Danny gulped as his eyes looked firmly downward, Danny was pale and tired as he continued   
"He dumped a gallon of gasoline on me, all over, then he proceeded to take another gallon of gasoline and soaked my bed. He then...he raped me. He raped me over and over, I didn't even know for how long it lasted, I couldn't see my bedside clock. I couldn't even reach my phone. He forced me to look into his eyes as he raped me, I could see nothing but soullessness in his eyes, he was forcing me to be aroused to enjoy the rape and to...ejaculate with him."  
Danny gulped as he continued  
"I remember him shooting me, and that's when everything when dark again and he dragged me out. I don't remember much afterward until I woke up in an alleyway and I could hear the cops coming to rescue me. It was completely terrifying as I was put into an ambulance. I had no idea if I was going to be saved or kidnapped again."  
The defense attorney smirked and said  
"That is a very detailed story right there Danny."  
"Its Captain to you, counsel." Danny snarked back  
"You see, you forgot to mention that you didn't try to fight back as you were raped...does that mean that you were ever raped at all?"  
Barba yelled   
"OBJECTION!!" before he even stood up, his blood boiling with rage, with how they were shaming a depressed and drained main who had been threatened with his life if he dared resist.   
Barba knew they were trying to shred Danny because they knew they had nothing to lose, that their chances of avoiding jail was slim, but if they could do some mud slinging in the process to destroy his reputation.  
Then Buchanan added  
"You seem to be unable to recall bits and pieces of your story, as if you have amnesia, can it be certain that you were really raped and not just you trying to get your name in the headlines, I mean, you must be a man who is jealous of his fathers media attention."  
Barba noticed that Danny was trembling with terror and he moved for another objection due to leading and intimidating the witness. Barba requested a recess and not a moment too soon because Danny bolted out and vomited in a trash can, he heaved out whatever breakfast he had and he could feel someone rubbing his back, his memories of the rape becoming more sharper and clearer with each breath he took and he glanced at Peter and he nodded before going back in as he sat on the chair and the defense had no more questions for him, soon he sat down as two more witnesses were interviewed and then court was adjourned. Danny was soaked from head to toe in sweat and he quickly drove home to avoid the crowds and got dressed in his uniform to attend Eames's funeral down at the funeral home, he went there, he was dressed in full dress blues as the sun shone above them, he went inside with his whole family by his side as they watched the coffin be brought in by the NYPD cops she had worked with, Goren had tears in his eyes he refused to shed as he held the coffin balanced on his shoulder and he helped place it on the raised dais, her coffin had the American flag draped on the coffin as Commissioner Frank came up to deliver his speech and his gratitude that this brave woman had taken down so many criminals during her time as a cop and that her bravery would never be forgotten. The director of the FBI also spoke of her kindly and her Special Supervisor spoke as well, it was a dreary funeral and rain started to fall as the cops carried out the coffin and into the hearse to be buried.   
Danny watched her get buried in the same cemetery as his wife and he bawled harder than ever, his heart hurting as he wondered how life would go on now.


	17. There are no endings to this story.

Danny went to the courthouse three days later after much deliberation by the jury as to whether or not William Lewis was guilty by law and he sat down, watching as the prisoner was brought in, William Lewis was silent and yet had an aura of defiance as he was walked in shackles and chains that rattled loudly, the chains clinked and clanked as they shook and as the doomed man was brought forth and he sat down in the defendant's chair as he watched and waited. Danny was watching and waiting too, the whole world was as well, the rapist who had raped so many people, his circle and reign of terror was coming to a complete end and the victims and the survivors, except for Eli Manning were there, all offering Danny their unwavering support and gratitude over his courage to stand up to the remorseless monster who had been destroying lives since college and many of Danny's precinct of cops were there as well as silent support alongside his relatives as they all prayed that justice would come swift and just for the victim and that retribution would be equal, pound for pound for what they had suffered. And yet there was no way they could ever get back what they had lost, each and every one of the victims had suffered in one way or another and the damage was permanently irreparable as the scars would heal, but their impact would forever remain upon their souls as they carried the pain with as much tenacity as possible during this difficult time that they would try and restart the healing process, each and every one of them, including Olivia Benson herself.   
Soon the Bailiff called out that Judge Swanson had come in and that all should rise, and everyone did, as they did as custom dictated in the court and then they all sat down as the Judge commanded and then the Judge ordered the Jury to be brought in and they all had a flat, emotionless, expressionless face as the Judge said  
"Jury of the case of New York V Lewis, have we reached a verdict?"  
"Yes, Your Honor."  
"Can you please hand over the packet of the verdict forms to the bailiff after you have verified the signatures?"  
The forewoman made sure all the signatures were there and she said  
"All signatures are present, Your Honor."  
"Then please hand over the packet to the Bailiff, the verdict will be read by the stenographer."  
The woman then pulled out the packet of forms and read aloud   
"On the counts of rape, sexual assault and assault of a police officer, this court and jury has rendered all counts the defendant is accused of, guilty by all counts."  
The court officers hauled away the convicted rapist away to be booked into Rikers island and to be arraigned into federal court to face the federal charges of murdering a federal agent which carried capital punishment by federal law since the feds since still had the death penalty on their books. That night he was extradited to Ohio where he would face the federal grand jury there and it was going to be impossible for him to be able to find clemency.   
Danny sighed in relief and sobbed in his hands from all the emotions that were colliding through his entire body, he was not used to this trauma, this trauma was breaking him inside and now it was all over, now he needed to focus on himself and heal, as he left the courthouse, he saw Goren looking all distant and tired, he looked a decade older than a week ago when Eames was still alive and now, he looked tired and defeated as he sighed   
"Congrats Danny, I hope this outcome can help you find some closure, I know I am hoping for the same closure in a few months. I know I'm gonna need it as much as you did."  
"So what's next for you?"  
"Me? I'm planning to testify in federal court, fry this bastard for whatever is worth of him and then transfer back to D.C, I am planning to become a Special Supervisory Agent, just get some desk time for myself, forget the mess and heartbreak I might as well endure."  
Danny nodded   
"I know where that is coming from, I lost my wife Linda nine years ago and it still feels like yesterday that I had to bury her, nine goddamn years of heartbreak and loneliness, and don't let anybody force you to get back on the saddle sooner than you are mentally able, trust me, my pops wants me to find someone already, but I don't think I'll ever be ready to be honest, Linda was supposed to live with me until we grew old and died in each others arms, and yet now, here I am, fifty six and a goddamn widower all alone."  
"See? That's where you're wrong. You have your family. You have them all. Trust them to guide you out of your pain."  
Danny nodded as they shook hands and Goren left and rubbed his baby bump. He let the lights of the cameras bathe over him as the voices of the reporters faded to a soft white noise as he was guided out by Sonny and Barba, husbands for life and willing to face the future and the unknown with his unborn child.  
THE END!


End file.
